I honestly don’t think I’ve ever been more disgusted by a group of parents in my entire life than I was last weekend at my daughter’s soccer game. And trust me, I know competitive parents—they’re everywhere. But this was something else entirely.
I should preface this by saying I’m one of the most competitive people you’ll ever meet. I was raised an athlete; competition runs in my blood. I love a good rivalry just as much as the next person. But I also know when to turn off my competitive switch. Apparently, a lot more parents need to learn that feature.
My daughter Presley just turned seven. Most of the girls on her soccer team are six. All of them are first graders. Only two girls, Presley included, have ever played soccer before this season. This sport is completely new to our team of nine girls. They knew one basic rule going into it: don’t touch the ball with your hands. That’s it.
This league is purely recreational. Anyone can sign up—sisters, nieces, granddaughters, neighbors—you name it. Sign up, pay the $100 fee, and spend 11 weeks learning the game. We practice once a week, play a single game each Saturday, and there are no tryouts, no playoffs, no travel, and no keeping score. Every child plays the same amount, and every child takes home a trophy at the end. It’s a fun league. A beginner league. The “hang out with your friends and learn a new sport” league.
And again…these kids are six. Some are seven.
One of the moms on our team even made a really fun sign for the girls. They got to pick a team name and chose “The Snow Wolves.” One mom spent a whole weekend creating this masterpiece, just for the girls to show off at their games. Little touches like that make the experience exciting and memorable, and I deeply appreciate those mamas who go out of their way to add joy to a child’s activity.
By week three, the girls had a much better understanding of the game. They knew not to touch the ball, they knew which goal to kick toward in each half, and they all took turns playing goalie. There are no referees, and the coaches guide them and shout instructions as needed. Everything is very basic. Beginner level.
At least…that’s what I thought.
The first two games had been pure fun. Both teams were learning, figuring out what to do, and all the parents cheered, clapped, and laughed along with the kids. We gasped when they tripped, giggled when they bent down to touch the ball, and genuinely celebrated their small victories. The girls were having fun, making friends, learning teamwork, and that was enough.
Then week three happened.
Within two minutes, it was clear this game would be a whole different experience. The other team was significantly more advanced. Some kids pick up sports quickly, and you could tell these girls had been playing together for years. My heart sank a little, but I tried to focus on keeping our girls’ spirits high. We cheered, clapped, and encouraged them, hoping they would enjoy the game even if it was tough.
The parents on the other team, however, had a completely different agenda. From the start, they began mocking our girls.
When one of our girls got a breakaway and tripped over the ball, a parent snickered, “Soccer dribbling is a pretty basic skill!”
When another girl took a corner kick but kicked up the field instead of toward the goal, a parent laughed, “She does realize she’s in a green jersey, right? That means kick it to a GREEN player! Not a white one! Hahaha.”
When our girls tried to kick properly, they were told they needed to kick with the side of their foot, not their toe—even though this is something we had been practicing at every session.
When one of our girls didn’t aggressively chase the ball, another parent said, “You have to actually try.”
And my personal favorite: when our goalie grabbed the ball, played around with it, and it rolled into the goal while waiting for substitutions, a parent yelled, “Hey! The ball went in the goal! That’s a point for us!”
Newsflash: we don’t keep score.
Really? Making fun of six- and seven-year-old girls during their first month of trying a new sport? That’s the pinnacle of maturity, right there. Three big claps for you.
This is recreational soccer. Not a college showcase. Not a feeder for Team USA. These girls are brand new to the sport. Yes, some kids are naturally talented. Yes, maybe your kid is going to the Olympics one day. But for the rest of us, all we want is for our kids to try something new, be active, learn teamwork, and have fun.
I clapped for the other team when they scored goal after goal because it’s amazing to see kids so passionate and confident in something they love. I wanted them to know even their opponents’ parents were proud. I just wish the same could have been returned to our girls.
Parents, we can do better. If you take this stuff so seriously, maybe stay out of recreational leagues and join a private travel team. Leave the fun zone alone. Cheer for all the kids. Encourage them. Celebrate their efforts. Because at this age, enthusiasm, courage, and joy matter so much more than perfection or scorelines.
Our girls will remember the excitement, the laughter, and yes, even the challenges. And those are the memories worth keeping.
