This morning, our daughter had a school event that her daddy and I had both promised to attend, and she had been counting down the days. She woke up buzzing with excitement for one simple reason.
Daddy was coming.
You see, Daddy has missed a lot lately.
He moved down a full month before we did, which meant missing school awards day and field day back home in South Carolina. And now that we’re fully settled into life down here, he’s missed Open House, Meet the Teacher night, and more after-school activities than either of us would like to admit.
His new job comes with unpredictable hours and late-night messages asking if he can come in on his day off. And when that happens, Daddy misses out.
That’s hard on her, because she is a Daddy’s girl through and through.
And it’s hard on Daddy, too.
That’s why last night, at 10:30, he came to me holding his phone, worry written all over his face, asking what he should do.
“They want to know if I’ll come in tomorrow,” he said. “I don’t know what to say. Tell me what you think I should do.”
“Honey,” I told him gently, “I can’t make that decision for you. You have to do what you think is right in this situation.”
And he wrestled with it. Back and forth, again and again, asking me to just tell him what to do. But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t.
In the end, he decided to go to work. In his line of work, every day is a chance to earn new bonus levels and extra income—an opportunity to build a comfortable life for our family. One that allows us to relax and travel during the off-season, something we truly love and value.
Still, that didn’t make the decision any easier.
His heart hurt when he had to tell her this morning. He woke her up extra early and brought her downstairs to watch funny YouTube videos together—his quiet way of saying, I love you, and I’m so sorry I’m missing another important moment.
When he left for work, he told me again how much it hurt to miss her event. I could see the guilt sitting heavy on his heart.
But he made the best decision he could with the situation in front of him. And he knew I’d be there cheering her on, snapping a million pictures, and keeping him updated every step of the way. And that’s exactly what I did.
So no, Daddy couldn’t be there today. And there’s a very real chance he might miss the next one, too. But these are the sacrifices Daddy makes so that she and her brother can have more than we ever did. So they can grow up in a safe, comfortable home. So they can live the kind of life we once only dreamed about as kids.
And it’s my job to teach her that we’re lucky Daddy has a job to go to. That we’re blessed he works so hard to give us so much. And that hard work often comes with sacrifice.
Today, Daddy made a tough decision.
Today, he did what so many parents around the world are forced to do every single day.
As much as they hate it. As much as it hurts. As heavy as the guilt can feel.
Sometimes, as parents, we have to make impossible choices.
That doesn’t make us bad parents.
It doesn’t mean our children aren’t our entire world.
And it doesn’t mean we should carry the weight of guilt forever for missing yet another moment.
Because what matters most is that Daddy is always there for her—even when he physically can’t be.
And like so many parents who miss the little things, Daddy loves her with every fiber of his being.
We’re all just doing the very best we can. And truly, that is more than enough.
